Fear regret more than failure

I assume it would be great if we can start this article with a quote that inspires me, and I hope that it inspires you too. Here goes the quote by Germany Kent,

7 Rules to a Happy Life:

1. Be humble

2. Don’t worry

3. Don’t settle for less

4. Mind your business

5. Work hard

6. Play hard

7. Be nice

To be successful in life, one must be happy with themselves, their surroundings, and there should be nothing depressing around the human as once the mood gets low, humans tend to overthink and ruin their most precious time in which they can be happy and spread positivity around. I am not saying this just like that, this knowledge comes to me through the various struggles I had to face in my life. I overcame those, and here I am today, all Happy and a positive person.

Today I think my life was easy till my school time post that I had good ups and considerable downs in my life. Let’s go back to the past to 2014, the year I joined the college to pursue my BCA degree. In the year 2015, my hectic life started and which I hated like anything. Being in College 2nd year, I got my semester results, and yes, I had backlogs, which was a considerable down at that point of my life, but I stood strong and tried multiple times to clear the subjects left. Eventually, the time passed and my semesters passed and I was still stuck with my backlogs. This was the time I made up my mind to tell my parents that I cannot do this degree and I need to do something else. But as most Indian parents mine refused the decision of me quitting and motivated me to pass through this struggle and complete what I had started.

Hence came the year of 2017 my passing out the year, and I didn’t pass out as I still had few backlogs left. Seeing my batch mates getting their degree gave me happiness, but not being with them in a gown and degree in my hand made me low, also gave me a heart and mental ache. My parents and my family members were totally not happy with what tussle was going on with me and my degree. Some even claimed I did drugs (Which I never did); hence I am unable to clear the same. But eventually, I managed to clear, and I thank God for that.

During my college time, I was pretty sure about one thing that being — I cannot work under any firm and need to start with my own company ASAP. I tried my best to think about what is required in the world that I can provide to them. It was my practice every day after waking up. Eventually, I did try a few things, but due to budget constraints, the projects failed. Now Imagine me in 2017 the time I should have my degree, I didn’t have it, my business plans all failed. I themed myself as a loser in my eyes and where you are not confident about yourself no one around you is, You feel like everyone is looking at you and thinking how bad you are, you ruined your parent’s name, you are a disgrace to the family and all that. Even though it is nothing like that but an empty mind can make a very positive person a very negative person. I was focused on dropping out of college and sitting to think about what business to do, but my parents motivated me to get this degree. I did it for them and to make them happy. By this time, I took a step against my will and started working in a corporate company as Client Success Manager, I was lucky that I got this job without holding a degree as they were impressed by how I had portrayed myself in the hiring Interview.

Post-2017 was the time I used to work in an office and simultaneously study to complete my degree, 12 Noon to 8 PM work time post that dinner at home and back to studies. This was the daily routine I had to follow, which I obviously skipped many times. In turn, I explored YouTube by uploading videos, writing quotes for Instagram pages, emailing Youtubers on how they create their content, and being on the internet for anything that came to my mind, learned to use Photoshop as well during this time. It was totally doing the opposite of what I had to do actually, and that was study. But believe me, the time passed made me learn a lot of things that no books taught me. This was the time I got inclined towards automation using IOT (Arduino, Raspberry pie). Watching people create this stuff amazed me all the time, I had zero knowledge about the same, but I really wanted to do so and learn automation. Hence began a time where I watched the video to get IoT, automation, customization of CPU, How to build a CPU from scratch. Yes, not to mention I even did acting for a few YouTube channels, keeping my luck in mind those videos never got uploaded online, and I never got paid for that job.

Now imagine a 22-year-old guy working, studying not being able to do what he wanted zero business ideas occurring to him busy on the Internet surfing to what all comes to his mind. Yes, that was me, and I eventually got into depression; hence another downfall started for me. I was unable to concentrate on my studies, mistakes in what I did in office increased drastically, and I had no escape from this now. I was indulged entirely into this depression phase. I was not in touch with a single friend of mine who barely contacted my parents and used to be shut and just lie down thinking about nonsense and non-useful things, which in turn used to get me lower. This continued till almost mid of 2019, and I was a wholly lost guy at that time, a guy who no one even wanted to help as I was shot tempered by that time, and I bashed any person trying to help me or talk to me. Hence came the time when you have nothing left neither in your heart nor your brain.

And I took the decision to resign from my job and start a new life, I took a good 3 months break and went home back to Kashmir to spend time with my family and especially myself. This was the time I stopped overthinking and practiced on my previous habit of thinking of business after getting up, this time with a little modification and that was “Think what the world needs”- before sleeping and “How can I get it to the world”- After waking up. It was a struggle at first but I kept on trying and held on to it as I did with my degree. The best quote that fits here is “try try try till you succeed.” And that’s what I did.

In January 2020, I got back to Pune with no idea of what to do and yet still not in my good moods. I decided to start with meditation though nothing helped, so let’s try this and see if this works and also helps me to get back on my feet again, I took help from meditation teachers, I used to visit them almost 5 days a week for 2 months. And trust me it worked, It made me the person I wanted to be and that what I was before getting into this trench of depression. Leaving this aside, I would like to tell you people no matter what happens in your life, no matter how many downfalls occur, never let depression take over you as it makes us miss the time we could have happily spent, and we as humans could have cherished for life.

Now slowly getting back on my toes and being happy, I started catching up with my friends again almost now every day we used to sit and chill together.

It was good being back on track, but the only thing that mattered now was work, I had no job, and I had no business started yet. Not taking this low positively would have landed me again in the big trench I mentioned above, but thankfully being around with friends and meditation helped me take this down in a very positive way. It was one day in February 2020, My friend came to me with his custom CPU and told me to see it and let him know if this can be fixed (Now here you remember the time I was busy surfing YouTube? Yes, nowhere that knowledge was useful to me.) I had a good look at the CPU and post that gave him the affirmative that this can be fixed. While fixing this CPU, an idea struck to me, and I got an idea to open up a company that Provides people with Custom CPU’s and anything they want to automate e.g., I had a friend who wanted his RC controlled toy car to be controlled by his Phone instead of the RC. While working on these two projects, I was pretty confident that I can start a company and fulfill my dreams and help people to automate their things.

By this, we could have started a company and would probably have quite a few projects in hand. Still, due to the prevailing conditions (COVID-19), I decided to postpone the start of my company, and I got back to Kashmir as my parents got worried and wanted to be home during this Pandemic. Moving forward, however, I am not wasting this time doing anything. Still, I make sure I stay healthy, positive, focused on my goals, read, and get ample knowledge of the company I am starting and coping with the new technology available.

If you have reached here, I assume that you liked my story. I would like you all readers to know that no matter what happens — be strong, stay positive, work for your goals, be happy. These are the only things that help humans grow.

I assume that few motivation quotes would be great at this point in time.

Here are few from my favorite from the collection:-

1) Dream big sky is the limit.

2) You are beautiful, You are one of a kind, SMILE MORE — Roman Atwood

3) TRY, TRY, and TRY until you succeed.

4) Unleash the potential that is in another, and you unleash the potential that is in you.

– Matshona Dhliwayo

5) Always be there for others. Always inspire them with your dreams and hope, vision and mission, attitude, and aptitude. — Debasish Mridha

Have a great and happy life, guys, live life as you want, and dream it to be. Things will fall in place with time. Stay safe during these tough times, Help the needy, God bless you all and shower his blessings upon you.

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Hey, I am Himal!

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